‘Tis the season that tests relationships everywhere. In the month of December, your social and family obligations are many, your free time is scarce, and your fast-paced life full of fun and festive activity is apt to create frustration and exhaustion. Couples are often strained this time of year, but with a little planning, much of your relationship stress can be avoided. The key is to work together and tackle the holiday hoopla as a team, rather than taking out anxieties on each other. Here are a few ways to avoid screaming matches with your lover, and then a few ways to unwind with him and show him how much you love him.

Plan Ahead, Avoid Conflict

Learn to say No

You don’t have to say yes to every invitation that comes along. Choose only those functions that you really want to go to. That way you can avoid feeling overtired and robbed of your time, and you can spend more time alone together.

Stay Connected

Even if you’re spending a lot of time with your guy, if you’re constantly going from party to party, you’re not enjoying any quality time together. If a certain week is jam-packed with obligations, spend a few moments before each event catching up on each other’s lives. While at a gathering, check in with each other over the course of the night to feel bonded. Physical touch, like holding hands, hugging, or a loving hand squeeze as you walk by can also strengthen your connection.

Relax during your together time

To avoid burnout. keep your date nights together low-key. Rather than dressing up and spending money on a night out, make some popcorn, snuggle with a movie, give each other back rubs, and unwind together instead.

Choose your rituals

The holiday traditions that are important to you may not be very meaningful to him, and vice versa. First, decide which of those you really want to share with him, and which ones you wouldn’t mind just sharing with close friends or family. This way, you won’t overwhelm yourself or your partner with non-sentimental c0mmitments.